Spring Cleaning

Wednesday June 27, 2007
12:35 am

My girlfriend’s boyfriend passed away yesterday.
Death is funny like that; just when you get round to planning to actually go see the people you wanna see, especially when they’ve been ill, the beautiful Angel of Death comes along and walks them into the light.

Even more poignant for me is that this is not the first time this kind of thing is happening to me. Many years ago, whilst I was a disillusioned student at Makerere, counting the days until I could leave, my friend Nsangi’s Jajja Mukwaya passed away after a prolonged battle with cancer. And the week she passed away was right before the weekend when I was finally going to go have tea with this legendary woman that I’d heard so much about. And she me as well. To this day I regret … I went to her funeral.

Then there was Tim my cousin when we were like ten years old. He was like my first best friend. Which is funny considering that we really aint blood cousins, our mums just went to campus together and were best friends or some shit like that in Africa Hall. Then like parents are wont to do, they expect y’all to be tight because they are. Tim and I were tight for real. I remember he used to make fun of my 10 year old Little Johnnie “morning glory” every morning when we’d queue up, toothbrush in hand, at the bathroom sink (by the way you owe me for that Tim). I don’t remember what I would tease him about; there wasn’t much you could use against him, he was just cool like that.

And as for his siblings, well, we’re still working on it. One of them is like going to have a baby next month, they aint told me yet and are acting like I don’t be needing to know. No baby presents for them then; afterall, I “don’t know.” Tim died in the second term holidays of p.5, days before we were going to get together for the holidays, I think it was his turn to come to my house in Jinja. To this day, every time I go to St. Andrews Bukoto – which is like never, and only for funerals – I remember Cowboys and Indians with Tim in the bush that is now Total Bukoto, just before the Brown Flats. Adieu Mon ami, fare thee well.

And as for my girlfriend’s boyfriend, I visited him in hospital with her a few months ago and was entertained with the entire history of their relationship dating back to her primary school days, when he “inherited” her after her elder sis grew too old. People, do me a favour yeah, if your dad is still alive and on the wrong side of …40, please pretty please get them to start checking out their prostate gland. You might cringe at the thought of your daddy looking into the state of the family jewels, believe you me that does not compare to the utter devastation, the immeasurable and incomparable pain of losing him to prostate cancer. So for Derrick and your family, I thank God for your father’s life and even more for y’all, perchance we’ll get round someday soon to having that chat we talked about outside your dad’s room ages ago.

Dear Professor Rukare, Rest in Peace Good Sir, and until we have the opportunity to hang out together again, I’ll take good care of your girlfriend for you. Say hi to my Dad, Tim, P-tech, Jajja Mukwaya, Mr. Waiswa my P.5 English language teacher, Aunt Berna, DJ Berry and Luther Vandross for me please.

It’s been real.

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Spring Cleaning

5 thoughts on “Spring Cleaning

  1. And then I go from here and claim I am your fan, when every fuckin’ post of yours gets me to the Other End with no thoughts I can find English words for.

    Where’s tongues when you’s needin’ ’em?

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  2. Fujitsu says:

    Deg, Prof. Rukare is, was, my uncle! Are we, gasp, related?

    Spill your family tree details immediately. And since when you be callin’ aunt Gwennie yo girlfriend? You better tell me I’m wrong or else…

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  3. fuji,
    lol, would that we were relaz!
    no love, prof. was my galfrend’s “uncle”, her parents were lecturers on campus n she grew up with his kids. after my woman’s elder sis grew 2 old 4 him, he took mukyala on as his “galfrend” – but 4 playing only.

    magoola,
    u’s a nasty negro.

    comrade,
    dat shit happens to the best of us, u’ll get ur elucidation back, eventually

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